 | ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
No College - No Regrets
by Rebekah Bentley
“Ya mean ya don’t hafta go to college?!” Wide eyes and shocked expressions made it obvious that the concept of foregoing a college education was foreign to most of the girls clustered around me, pressing me for details about my life.
Sadly, little girls today are being trained to grow up into young women who believe they have no choice but to attend college
after high school is over. If they don’t, they’re told, they won’t be able to support themselves when they move out on their own, will never “find themselves,” won’t meet any eligible young men to marry, won’t be able to find an adequate job, or simply will regret it later in life and won’t feel “fulfilled.” According to modern-day thinking, women have the right to go to college and so they should—whether they want to or not.
Certainly there is nothing wrong with furthering one’s education, be it at college or elsewhere. This is, in fact, a noble cause! But why does society feel the need to pressure girls towards their bachelor’s and master’s degrees (or the “college experience”), depriving them of the beautiful blessing of choice?
What happened to freedom of choice if girls are being trained from an early age that attending college is the next—the required—step after high school? Where is their right to make decisions for themselves when it has been ingrained in their minds that women who don’t attend college are somehow inferior, incompetent, or unsatisfied? This sort of thinking, though absurd, is tragically prevalent today, even though 100 years ago it was rare for a woman to attend college, and somehow the world - and the women within it - managed just fine. However, it seems that society in general has become convinced by those who advocate feminism and women’s rights that if a woman does not attend college, she will live a life of inferiority and regret. This is simply not so.
This article is not to demean women who do attend college, but simply to point out that it is plausible, and actually fairly common, to choose to not attend college and have no regrets over it later in life.
Staying home to cook and clean?
So, if a girl doesn’t go to college, what does she do? When I was a senior in high school I was often asked that question in one form or another. It generally came after the shocked silence following my announcement that I wasn’t planning to attend college. My answer would vary slightly, depending on the listeners and how open they seemed to hearing about a life route that differed from the norm. To some, I would say that God had not led me to college and that, unless He did, I believed I was to remain at home. To those who were more skeptical I would often point out I already had the job I desired, and it seemed senseless to leave it to pursue a degree just so that in a few years I could return and try to get another job just like it!
A few years later (while I would have been a college senior had I pursued a four-year degree), the director of the dance studio at which I taught offered me a promotion. Acting, one of my passions, was also something I was able to pursue - professionally! Had I been in college I might have been involved in a musical or a play, but certainly not for compensation. Staying at home I was also able to begin working for our state homeschool organization, alongside my parents, and to continue in my childcare position. All of these were part-time jobs, some running in different seasons than others, allowing me ample time to stay home and help around the house, learn from my parents, go on short-term mission trips, and spend time with my younger sisters as well as my older sisters and their families, and to enjoy even more opportunities!
This is not to boast of my accomplishments, but to dispel the myth that a college degree is required to obtain a job that one enjoys, or that stay-at-home daughters must do nothing but remain at home to be “the maid.” Ask the Lord for opportunities to use the talents and desires He has given you.
Long-term success is not defined by degrees.
A degree does not guarantee a career; a job does not always require a degree; and a college diploma does not define a person. Take a look at those around you. Do you know who has a college degree and who does not? Perhaps the people you think are the most educated are really “only” high school graduates or GED recipients. Maybe the next-door neighbor who does lawn maintenance for a living has a PhD.
One member of my family has been offered teaching and office management positions, even without any sort of college education. On the other hand, another (seminary-educated) relative is currently without a pastorate and, until just recently, was working (happily!) as a painter to support his family.
Granted, there are some career paths which it would be foolish to pursue without a relevant degree, but many occupations don’t require a college diploma, and some of the people who have made the most significant contributions to our society were people with no formal training in their fields.
For example,* Thomas Edison, who patented over one thousand inventions and introduced the electric light bulb to the world, had only three months of formal schooling throughout his life. Wilbur and Orville Wright, inventors and builders of the first successful airplane, had no more than high school educations, and yet were learned in aeronautics and ran a weekly newspaper at one point in their lives. Henry Ford became a machinist at the age of 16 and later held a job as an engineer, eventually building a gasoline engine and his first automobile—the beginning of a very successful career and one of the world’s leading automobile companies, where he introduced the world to the assembly line system—all with only three years of formal schooling. Eleanor Roosevelt, wife of United States president Franklin Roosevelt, had no college education. After her marriage to FDR, Eleanor became an avid humanitarian, actively assisted her husband in his political career, wrote a newspaper column, and was herself a well-known political figure. Successful cooking show host, author, and magazine publisher Rachael Ray got her education in the food industry
by following her mom around the family restaurant and then working her way up through jobs, beginning by holding a position as a candy counter sales clerk at Macy’s Marketplace.
Would you have guessed that these were “uneducated” people? It’s nearly impossible to know who has some level of “higher education” and who does not, based solely on what job they hold. Looking deeper, however, we see that no matter how well educated an employee may be, without a good work ethic, her education is generally useless, since most employers will not keep such a person in their service for very long. This alone should help reveal to us that it is not her education, but rather the character of a person, that truly defines who she is.
Finding fulfillment in life.
One of the arguments I have heard in favor of all women attending college is that when a non-collegiate woman is married and has children (assuming, remember, that she has even found a husband despite not attending college), she will feel unfulfilled and regret not having both a college degree and a career before settling down. Although the feeling of unfulfillment may be very real, it is more a matter of discontentment that needs to be dealt with in prayer than a consequence of the “deficit” of a college education. Another interesting thing to note is that, in general, the women who promote this mindset are actually women who did attend college and had “lives of their own” before they "settled down."
One of the reasons behind the thought that a life without college will lead to regret and discontentment later on is that people generally believe a life without regrets is a life that was lived to serve some purpose, and many think that once you’re married and have children, your opportunities to make a difference in the world have disappeared. So many people think that only those in “high places” can be people of influence. Sometimes, however, it is the “hidden people” of the world who create the most change or the most good, oftentimes simply by influencing the leaders, inventors, writers, and artists of tomorrow.
If Nancy Edison hadn’t taken her young son Thomas out of school and encouraged him to explore science on his own, would we have had an electric light as early as the 19th century? Would John Adams have been able to run his presidency as well, or fight as hard to put the Continental Congress in motion, if he hadn’t had Abigail’s undying support? Might we have never heard the beautiful music of composers such as Sergei Prokofiev and Edvard Grieg** if their mothers had not taken the time to teach their sons to play piano and encouraged them in their musical studies?
The Lord desires for us to influence those around us, no matter where He has placed us.
Look for ways to serve.
The opportunities for a young woman who does not attend college are infinite (material for another article perhaps) and I encourage you to seek out ways to minister to those around you while you are still unmarried. As the apostle Paul said in I Corinthians 7:34, “…An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit….” (NIV)
There is no better time to serve than now—these blessed, beautiful years of singledom. And, if we use this time wisely, years down the road we can look back at these days and sigh with a deep sense of gratitude for all the things we learned and accomplished with the hours that were given to us…with no regrets.
*The author does not neccesarily endorse the lifestyles, or political or religious views held by the noted individuals. These examples are to show that success, measured by contributions to society, can be achieved without a college education.
**Composers of “Peter and the Wolf” and “Peer Gynt,” respectively.
-------------
Originally published in A Lady in Waiting, Volume 1, Issue 2.
| ||||
| ||||
| ||||
BACK ISSUES:
Premier Issue: Vol.1, Iss.1
The Value of Time
Copies of this issue can be purchased for $3.00 (and FREE shipping) - $1.50 off retail price!
(Please contact us for non-US order inquiries.)
The Marketplace
This issue's advertisers:
Practical ideas for busy families
Helping families "seek the LORD and His strength."
Your Christian General Store
Encouraging and equipping women for the glory of God!
| ||||
What do you think?
Did you enjoy these articles? Would you like to receive information and encouragement like this in hard copy? Why not subscribe!
What else would you like to see in the pages of A Lady in Waiting? Do you have article ideas, recipes, or suggestions on how we can improve the quality of the magazine? A Lady in Waiting is written for you - please share your ideas; we'd love to hear from you!
| ||||
| ||||
CURRENT ISSUES
Volume 1, Issue 2
Unveiling Truth
Purchase your copy of this (print) issue for $4.00.
(Continental US only - overseas customers,contact me for pricing.)
AND
the special downloadable 24-page
Purchase your copy of this downloadable issue for $2.00.
Download information will be e-mailed within 48 hours.
| ||||
Book Review
Handmaidens of the Lord by Crystal Paine
This little book is a must-read for ladies in waiting… particularly graduates! Handmaidens of the Lord is beautifully written by several young women who have chosen a less travelled-road—that of staying home after graduation. Topics covered include being a blessing to fathers and families, ministry and business ideas, homemaking, and more, all while promoting the importance of a servant’s heart above all else. Through the testimonies and thoughts of these young women, we catch an inspiring glimpse of beautiful, active, Christ-centered lives of those who chose to stay home under their father’s authority.
Full of challenging thoughts and practical ideas, this book is bound to be a blessing to young ladies. You will be encouraged to read how other young women are living counter-culture. I know I was challenged and inspired by it!
Review by Elisabeth Speitelsbach
Handmaidens of the Lord is available for purchase at Biblical Womanhood.
Are you interested in short-term missions work? Can you sing or play a musical instrument, teach Bible lessons, share the gospel with non-believers, or simply love on the children of India?
Then maybe God would like you to go with us to India in 2008!
This trip is open to believers over the age of 16. Men, women, couples, families - all are welcome! If you believe God is calling you to India, please pray about this trip. Click here for more details.
| ||||
| ||||
Here are just a few of the reasons you might want to join us:
Have iron-sharpening-iron discussions with other like-minded young ladies
Find fellowship and encouragement
Share book suggestions
Swap recipes, cooking tips, and other homemaking ideas
Post prayer requests and praise reports
Pray for the needs of the other young women and rejoice with them as they share answers to prayer
| ||||
After our home page, this is the most frequently visited page on our site. Would you like to place an ad here?
Visit our advertising page for more information.
Write for us!
Would you like to submit an article for one of our upcoming issues? Look at our submissions guidelines for future themes and needs.
| ||||
Holiday Issue 2007
Table of Contents
How to Write a
Thank-You NoteMaximizing Christmas
Holiday Traditions
A Portrait of Christ in
HanukkahBuffet Tips for Holiday
HospitalityThe Recipe Box
Holiday Opportunities
Planning a Thanksgiving
FeastHow to Host a Holiday Ball
Holiday Reading
Homemade Holidays
Missions Monitor:
Samaritan’s PurseAnd more!
This special download-only issue of the magazine is 24 pages!
